Illness and Crisis: What is the Reason for My Suffering?

[Mindful disclaimer: I am neither in the possession of truth, nor do I have – as they say - monopoly on the truth. Everybody has to seek and find what’s true for them. I am just another soul on the path of Truth (with a capital T) – whatever that means. While I travel down the long and lonesome road of life’s ups and downs, I have chosen the art of writing as my tool to dig deeper, in hope of finding pieces of clues that will help me solve life’s mysteries. Like a transpersonal archeologist, I am digging deep, working on making sense of the fantastically puzzling questions that revolve around the meaning of life and human existence. I am looking for clues to human existence that will shift our consciousness and help us see things through different, more loving, compassionate, forgiving and kinder lenses. So that we may not only transform our own being, but humankind collectively.]



Suffering does not mean failure. Some people are fighting their suffering, because they perceive it as a punishment. Shockingly, some people even believe that they deserve their pain and suffering, often caused by illness; deserve to be sick and miserable. Where does this assumption come from?

Most programming of our subconscious mind happens in early childhood. Our waking consciousness is just the tip of the iceberg and like an iceberg the tip represents our waking, conscious mind. However, the lower part, representing our subconscious mind, is under water and hence cannot be seen. It is much deeper than we can imagine. In order to understand it, you have dive deep down into your own being. The programming of our subconscious mind influences our waking life without our control or knowledge and programming happens in early childhood, perhaps even earlier. In terms of suffering and illness, many people were raised to assume that to suffer means to be punished.

If you are one of those people, we are in need of some serious reprogramming of your subconscious mind. Because to suffer NEVER means to be punished. Illness is not punishment! Can we repeat this to make sure our subconscious gets it?

My suffering is not my punishment!”

Illness and suffering – whether it is serious or not, physical or mental – can throw people into crisis. Did you know that the word “crisis” is derived from the Greek and, among other things, means to decide?

It refers to making a decision and having a choice. And so, a crisis caused by illness and suffering, can become a crisis of decision. The decision to start a new chapter in your life. Our pain and suffering, no matter if it is caused by a broken heart or the shattering diagnosis of a serious illness, can bring us to the edge of what we can endure. The edge of our own being and existence. It feels like, if we only take one more step we will fall into an abyss. It is a situation in which fundamental insecurities can rise up to the surface of our psyche.

The question, however, is if we choose to see this insecurity, this fear, this threat to our existence as the door to something new. A new beginning of some sort. Understanding the meaning of this insecurity is essential in this decision. The fear we feel as we stand on the edge to change is caused by uncertainty. We cannot predict the outcome of choosing this new beginning. We don’t know what it will bring. That is why we feel fear.

For me, Crisis, failure and suffering are a call from life to start anew. 

“You have to look for meaning and purpose deeper than you have done before”, life calls to you. “Go deeper!”, it encourages.

“Understand your subconscious mind”, I want to add, “It will bring a lot of healing -I promise”.

The purpose of crisis and suffering is to awaken us. It is to awaken our mind, our heart and our soul. Crisis is the obstacle meant to divert you from your current path, because what you are doing now and have been doing in the past is not working out.

Your crisis is your friend and it is meant to lead into a new, a better direction. Crisis is a catalyst for shifting your consciousness.(Because the real revolution currently happening is a quiet one; a shift in consciousness, heart, mind and soul in each one of us) It challenges your perspectives and assumptions and asks: “Is this really the best direction? Or should I be open to other ways?”

However, before such a shift can happen, you need a wake-up call. And we won’t wake up, unless it is uncomfortable, unless we suffer – even just a little bit. (And frankly, as an aspiring “professional sleeper”, my alarm clock does cause me a bit of suffering every day I have to wake up.*Laugh*)

Hence, illness, suffering, pain, failure is nothing negative in my eyes. On the contrary, it is a wonderful chance for a new beginning, offered to you by life.

Will you accept life’s call?

From soul to soul and heart to heart,


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